Basic Newswriting & Reporting
Journalism 30
Course
Description | Grading | Reading | Course
Requirements | Links | Weekly
Assignments
e-mail
foxs@csus.edu
Do's and Don'ts in Newswriting Style PART 4
Ramping it up: Newswriting Basics
SPEECH LEADS
Lead
with what was said
Example 1: Learning to listen to your heart was the message
of the commencement speech to graduates at the University of West Florida
on Saturday.
Example 2: University of West Florida Professor Martha Saunders told graduates to listen to their hearts and remember simple life phrases.
Don't lead with the event: Martha Saunders, Assistant Professor of Public Relations, delivered a farewell speech at the University Of West Florida's graduation ceremony.
Quotes lead a paragraph
If it's good enough to be used as a direct quote, lead the sentence –– and the paragraph –– with it.
"Be somebody who will be there," Saunders said.
Keep it short.
"Your heart knows," Saunders said.
Don't bury the quote & keep it short.
By listening to your heart, she said, "there is an ability in each of you to find the rights answers for your life, it's there and it's a powerful gift that all the education or degrees in the world can't acquire for you."
THIS IS HOW TO USE QUOTES IN A STORY:
The
fire chief was very quotable :
Bernard Perry, fire chief: "The fire exploded near the center of
the barn. Flames were shooting out of the building when we got here. The
fire is definitely suspicious."
Example #1:
Fire Chief Barnard Perry said the fire exploded near the center of
the barn.
"Flames were shooting out of the building when we got here,"
Perry said. "The fire is definitely suspicious."
OR
Example
2: Fire Chief Barnard Perry said the fire exploded near the center of
the barn and flames were shooting out of the building when they arrived.
"The fire is definitely suspicious," Parks said.
OR
Example #3: Fire Chief Barnard Perry said the flames exploded and were shooting out of the building when they arrived.
"The fire was definitely suspicious," Perry said.
The general manager was not very quotable:
Dan Bucci, assistant general manager of the track: "It could have been of an incendiary nature because it started in the middle of the barn, not at the end. The only heaters and electrical outlets were in the tack rooms at the ends of the barn."
Example: Dan Bucci, assistant general manager of the track said the fire started in the middle of the barn, not at either end where the only heaters and electrical outlets were located
Titles
Incorrect:
Fire Chief, Bernard Perry
Incorrect: fire chief Bernard Perry
Incorrect: fire Chief Bernard Perry
Correct:
Fire Chief Bernard Perry
Incorrect:
Barnard Perry, Fire Chief
Correct: Bernard Perry, fire chief
PAST TENSE!
SAID!
Incorrect: She went on to explain how
Correct:
She explained how hard....
Incorrect:
She went on to share
Correct: She shared
Incorrect:
Saunders realized she had to...
Correct: Saunders said she realized she had to ..
Incorrect:
Saunders' final point regarding her three-word rule is that people learn
to listen.
Correct: Saunders said her three-word rule is that people
learn to listen.
Avoid passive transitions
Incorrect:
Saunders also spoke of the influence and importance of three-word phrases
in her speech.
Correct: Saunders said three-word phrases are the
most important verbal messages exchanged among people.
Change references in paraphrases:
Incorrect: You may have an outline of where you're headed, but you will have to make tough decisions along the way, Saunders said.
Correct: Students may have an outline of where they are headed, but they will have to make tough decisions along the way, Saunders said.
Do not conclude
Incorrect: She concluded the address by reminding us that in life there is no adviser that could provide you with instructions on how to earn a degree in life, and every step in life calls for decision making.
Correct: She reminded students that in life there is no adviser to provide them with instructions on how to earn a degree in life, and every step in life calls for decision making.
Remember to Spellcheck, and PROOFREAD!